Half a pipeline and … GO!

Hmmm … half a pipeline. That’s useful. Not sure how President Obama expects solve the fuel crisis and/or jobs crisis with half an oil pipeline, but hey.

This news, naturally, was ripe for the mockage.

Swell! We'll use buckets to bring it down from Canada! RT @brikeilarcnn BREAKING: Obama to expedite southern half of Keystone XL Pipeline

— Daniel Foster (@DanFosterType) March 20, 2012

Obama to fast-track southern half of the Keystone pipeline. Surely gas prices will fall immediately. http://t.co/ce2LJSBf

— Blake Hounshell (@blakehounshell) March 20, 2012

Biden: Obama's new plan to build half of the Keystone pipeline is the most audacious plan in the past 250 years.

— Cuffé (@CuffyMeh) March 20, 2012

Algae not panning out? RT @brikeilarcnn BREAKING: Obama to expedite southern half of Keystone XL Pipeline #tcot #p2

— RB (@RBPundit) March 20, 2012

FLASH: Obama only half-killed Osama Bin Laden. :(

— Cuffé (@CuffyMeh) March 20, 2012

Inspired by Obama's half-pipeline, I'm going to install a sprinkler system but not hook it up to a water supply.

— jon gabriel (@exjon) March 20, 2012

@ExJon They'll just shoot the oil in a 850 mile arc to southern pipeline. And they said pee-aiming wasn't a practical skill.

— Political Math (@politicalmath) March 20, 2012

BREAKING: Obama closes half of Gitmo.

— Cuffé (@CuffyMeh) March 20, 2012

Building only the last half of a pipeline is like building only the top half of a boat. #keystone

— jon gabriel (@exjon) March 20, 2012

Isn't having the southern half of a pipeline like only having the upper half of a cup?

— Jeremy (@knowsknothing) March 20, 2012

Half a pipeline approved by half a president? Yeah that pretty much makes sense.

— JavelinaBomb (@javelinabomb) March 20, 2012

I'm digging these new Obama half-policies. Unfortunately – and in spite of a tired cliche – Sandra Fluke is now half-pregnant.

— Cuffé (@CuffyMeh) March 20, 2012

@ExJon So are we building a pipeline not connected to anything?

— Nathan Wurtzel (@NathanWurtzel) March 20, 2012

So, Obama will approve half of Keystone pipeline that's already underway, but ignore part that actually gets to Canada/oil?

— Rory Cooper (@rorycooper) March 20, 2012

We're building half a pipeline. If Obama only spent half of his budget, we'd be in pretty good shape.

— Nathan Wurtzel (@NathanWurtzel) March 20, 2012

So now the President is for the Keystone XL pipeline? I was against the pipeline before for I was for the pipeline?

— theprez98 (总统) (@theprez98) March 20, 2012

What if they build a halfpipe all the way to the tar sands?

— Nathan Wurtzel (@NathanWurtzel) March 20, 2012

What a complete opportunist!! #ABOUTTIME @PoliticalTicker: Obama to fast track southern half of Keystone XL Pipeline – http://t.co/tpkijaNj

— Karen, RN (@kdubrn) March 20, 2012

So is Obama going to build the inside half of the pipe first or the outside half?

— Jim Jamitis (@anthropocon) March 20, 2012

Americans should respond to Obama approving building half the pipeline by giving him half the votes needed for reelection.

— Frank J. Fleming (@IMAO_) March 20, 2012

#ObamaHalfPolicies Death panels now just 50% deathy.

— Matt (@mdrache) March 20, 2012

Lemme get this straight. Obama is fast tracking half of a pipeline that he is unsure he can ever find a satisfactory route to complete?

— Lisa B. (@politeracy) March 20, 2012

The most audacious half-project in 500 years! MT @DanFosterNRO @brikeilarcnn Obama to expedite southern half of Keystone Pipeline #keystone

— Will Antonin (@Will_Antonin) March 20, 2012

#ObamaHalfPolicies We're going to open up ANWR for drilling, but only to Black & Decker.

— Caleb Howe (@CalebHowe) March 20, 2012

I'm glad Obama only gave half those guns to Mexican cartels. Whew.

— Cuffé (@CuffyMeh) March 20, 2012

With this latest move, the president has managed to simultaneously tick off opponents of the Keystone XL Pipeline (who view it as a betrayal of their — and his own — values) and supporters of the pipeline’s construction. He still thinks he can have his arugula and eat it, too.

Read more: http://twitchy.com/2012/03/20/half-a-pipeline-and-go/

February 2, 2016
Half a pipeline and … GO!

Half a pipeline and … GO!

President Obama to fast track southern half of Keystone XL Pipeline – will make announcement Thursday: http://t.co/SG4kwF0E — CNN (@CNN) March 20, 2012 Hmmm … half […]
February 1, 2016
50 Points to Gryffindor

50 Points to Gryffindor

Read more: http://imgur.com/gallery/E0qAxuR
February 1, 2016
An Open Letter (In GIFs) To That Guy Who Replied “Sorry I’m Not Into Asians”

An Open Letter (In GIFs) To That Guy Who Replied “Sorry I’m Not Into Asians”

#ohnoyoudidnt So I made the first move and texted you hi on the gay-dating app… and this is what you replied: “Sorry I’m not into Asians.” […]
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The groups of high school students touring my campus right now.

The groups of high school students touring my campus right now.

Read more: http://imgur.com/gallery/zYXZctI
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